Chef’s Chocolate Salty Balls
Aired: August 19, 1998
After a two month break in the new episode cycle, South Park returned in August with episode 2.9. While Chef’s Chocolate Salty Balls are a large part of South Park history, I don’t think I’ve ever seen this episode. In fact, I could still sing Chocolate Salty Balls word for word, but I recall nothing about episode 2.9.
My research for this episode led me down the rabbit hole of studying the track listing for the Chef Aid album which brought back a lot of memories. Chocolate Salty Balls is on that album as well as many other songs. We’ll dig deeper into that in a few episodes.
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Matt – 39.1
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This episode kicks off at the sun dance film festival. Robert and Phyllis are talking about how the mountain town where it is hosted has been “tapped out” and they decide to move it to South Park. Mr. Garrison is very excited about this and talking to his students about it. The students begin to debate what an independent film is. We then see the town buzzing with everyone for the festival. Chef is trying to sell his cookies. Specifically “Fudge ‘Ems”. However, he learns quickly that people from LA care much more about tofu or couscous. Wendy and Stan head to see an indpendent film. It is terrible. Kyle is “poopies” when he begins to hear Mr. Hankey. We go back to seeing the town buzzing with the festival, awaiting Hollywood’s celebreties, but they have to settle with Fred Savage. The boys discuss the movie Stan saw and Mr. Hankey. Phyllis and Robert discuss how they are going to take the festival to every small mountain town until every town is just like LA. We then see how Chef is now trying to sell “Chef’s Salty Chocolate Balls”. The boys love Chef’s salty chocolate balls. Kyle hears Mr. Hankey from the sewer. So of course, Kyle wants to check it out. Everyone at the festival LOVES Chef’s Salty Chocolate Balls. The boys head to the sewer in search of Mr. Hankey. However, they find Mr. Garrison in snorkle equipment. They then find Mr. Hankey in the sewer in a fris container. Mr. Hankey appears to be sick as the town is harming his “ecosystem” due to eating healthy foods. Kyle goes to tell everyone that they need to leave to save Mr. Hankey. Everyone takes this as a movie idea. A director decides to strike a deal with only Cartman. Robert announces that they are building a Hollywood Planet restaurant in place of the library. Kyle goes to take Mr. Hankey to the surface so everyone takes him serious. They already made an independent film of Mr. Hankey. Although, Cartman is pissed that Tom Hanks was cast for the movie. Kyle comes up with Mr. Hankey, but they do not have much time. The mayor then confronts Robert about calling off the festival. Robert shuts it down because they have contracts in place. Cartman finds out he only gets $3 for the movie. Kyle takes Mr. Hankey to Robert to show him he is real. However, Mr. Hankey had already dried out. After messing with Kyle, a HazMat official comes and takes Mr. Hankey away. Stan and Wendy go to see another film and it turns out to be about gay cowboys eating pudding. Chef gives Mr. Hankey a salty ball to take with him to poo heaven. This revives Mr. Hankey. Cartman decides to sell t-shirts to get more money out of the Mr. Hankey idea. At the reveal of Hollywood Planet, Kyle brings Mr. Hankey to show everyone. Everyone ignores him initially. Mr. Hankey goes to the stage to talk to everyone on the mic. Robert throws Mr. Hankey into a wall and dies. Chef revives him again with his Salty Chocolate Bals. Mr. Hankey does some Fantasia-type shit with the sewers, this scares everyone out of South Park. Wendy realizes independent fils suck. Cartman realizes being a sellout is awesome so he doesn’t have to hang out with “poor ass losers”.